Friendship may start in an unexpected way

Two friends in Rome (stock photo)

Friendship makes you rejoice with your friend’s joys and share with his sufferings. Friendship starts sometimes in an unexpected way. Maria was in her second year at university. I was a journalist and had started to give her Spanish lessons. I was a bit older than her, so I never thought that we would become friends, but we did.

One day, after some months without seeing each other, she called me and we went to coffee. She was sad. She had recently had an abortion. I asked her about the decision. What had her boyfriend thought? He had left her to decide freely on herself. And her parents? They told her that she could do whatever she wanted; she was big enough; she was free. And her friends? Her friends had all had at least one abortion by the moment. They were beautiful girls, with money. They were surrounded by university students from the richest families, who enjoyed every Saturday night on parties, drugs and alcohol. Just like everyone else.

I was consoled by the fact that at least nobody had forced her to abort. But time passed by, and I realized that she had changed.

The true meaning of freedom

From time to time, when she saw a baby, and later, a child, she said: “my baby would be at that age by now”. Why did she still think about it? In those moments, I used to think about the true meaning of freedom. Of course, nobody had told her to abort. But nobody had said: “If you have the baby, I will help you”.

We didn’t usually talk about this fact. I tried to help her go forward. But once, when she was about to finish her degree, she told me: “I was too young. I was not ready.” And it is true. Nothing about her situation, no one among her family or friends, no program or organization in the neighbourhood or the university encouraged her to have the baby. That’s what happens when abortion is permitted in a society. Hypocrisy reigns. You don’t find easily a helping hand when you go against the norm. “Do whatever you want.” Is that a helpful phrase?

Because you are unique

I would have given all I had to support Maria during her pregnancy. She could have been the more beautiful, the happiest and youngest girl in the city expecting a baby. I cried for her and with her. That is why I am proud to say that I am pro-life.

It is good to live in a society where you are respected, whatever your opinions, acts or decisions may be. But it would be better to live in a society where people told you: “if you abort, I respect you. But if you have the baby, I will support you. Because I know that you will need it. You can count on my savings. I will take your child for a walk on Saturdays so that you can rest. I will help you to explain it to your parents. And don’t worry about your friends. True friends love you because you are unique, not just because you make a number on their parties”.

By Belén Huertas.